Depart from the noise above

As meditation progress feel detached but aware of your thoughts. They become like the rivers where, on the surface there remains a strong flow of currents. But as you dive deep and deep the under current reduces. The silence increases more and more. But as you look up the current remains, the fallen leaves and unwanted things still keep tossing around, flowing. Go deeper within and remain observant of the silence getting deeper and deeper. The surface still would have thoughts flowing which doest not affect.

Fear

When we take analysis of Fear one step inside - Existence of Fear is because of the gap between 'What is' and 'What will be'. If the 'What will be' is something you 'Don't want' then it 'could' end up labeled Fear. If 'What will be' is something you 'Want' , then it is labeled Hope.

So it is interesting to note that the bridge between the two states is what causes a situation to be Fear vs Hope. So your selection of 'Want' vs 'Dont want' is what causes the same situation to become Fear for one and Hope for other.

Now if we take this one more step inside & forget the bridge - Fear exists because of the existence of the two states - 'What is' and 'What will be'. As long as you do move from the 'What is' state - you would not have fear.

So this explains why enlightened individuals might not feel fear at all. They are forever in the 'What is' state? So Fear has one meaning - You still have subjected yourself to two states of mind.

Decisions takes a toll

To the earlier message on focus, its scientifically proven, the lesser decisions you take, the more willpower you have,
which translates to achieving our goals.

https://youtu.be/WhbYBb0huMs
"Make fewer decisions. The more decisions we make, the more fatigued our brain becomes and the less effective we are over the long-term. So, first, stop browsing so much! Mindlessly browsing consumes incredible amounts of brainpower; every new link and every new piece of information to pay attention to eats up your mental energy and reserves. It costs you not only your focus, but your willpower and futurefocal power as well. If you’re looking for something, search for ONE thing, find it… and then stop. Limit your browsing and get back your brain."

And decisions are at every moment of life:
-  When you browse hours on flipkart, amazon etc on what to buy, it eats up your willpower.
-  when you browse news articles,  on which to read or give attention to.
-  when you have a conflict with a relationship and argue within yourself, right - wrong, say - not to say. It just burns willpower  up.
-  when you spend 10min deciding what to wear to work, to marriage.
-  when you decide what to cook each day.
-  when you decide, to overtake or not in traffic.
-  when you decide, to respond to any whatsapp message or not.
-  when you keep checking the phone for new messages. Is there a new one for me to respond?
Self help gurus say - if you are one who is not stuck in situations like these, chances are you can be an achiever.
Pay Attention to all decision making moments of life and keep it to the least time.

In-laws! Defnitely a wrong finding

In-laws is a wrong word used. In fact it should have been Out-laws ie if we were to coin 'In' as a positive vibe and 'Out' as negative. I live in this society for the past 39 years, I base this observation from this, I see quite a few in-laws to in-laws relationship behave like out-laws.
There is always an unwritten thought process - post 'Marriage' ie of the - your family vs my family demarcation. The degrees vary:
You spend all your money for your family.
You spend more time for them than me.
You have not helped my brother vs you helped your brother.
Your brother does not help in kitchen vs you help in kitchen.

We have no privacy because of your in laws and so on.

So I guess 'In-laws' should be renamed as 'Out-laws'?

My first death, can i face it?

If i can smile at my first death, then i can smile at my last death. 

All say- i  am not afraid to die.  Would that be true?

Please note all the incidents in life, for it really tells you how you might face your death.

For example, when the near ones moves away, keep observing:

The vacuum created inside,

The suction felt at the heart,

The emptiness felt in the tummy,

The thumping felt in the head,

The immense need to cry out loud, with no sound coming out,

The resounding sound of No, No which echoes from the heart, but the events just happens.

The shrilling cry within - saying i am loosing, i wont allow, but the event just happens.

The day they leave will be my first death. The news has shaken. The happening remains to be seen. The cry is drilling hard. 

It makes me stronger, i will have my vengeance, i will taste the  blood, I am ready to die a dogs death.

Returning to the house? Do it feel like visiting a place of death?

If i am shaken for this incident, would i  not break at the event of facing my death?

The suffering is unending, the conversation i had with colleague encourages me to stand up. 

The last man standing in the fight ring wins!

Use short term solutions to fight long term wars.

Use ego to hit back short term, but eventually ego hits you back. 

Like, use alcohol to be at peace short term, but long run it would drown you out.

 

So remember the ultimate solution:

Rule the mind and you have ruled them all - the opponent and yourself.

For it is true, No wonder god has put mind on your top!

Rather sad, money money money..

All humans lie about not being materialistic, even if their own kids are the topic:

• We buy an AC and run to work to pay the emi for it.
• Thereby we fail to enjoy the coolness of the AC as much as we should.

• We make a kid and run to work to pay for its nanny and its toys. Thereby we fail to enjoy the warmth of the kid as much as it is expecting.

I would have loved to spend more time, more play, more fight, more teaching, more tricks, more gummy bears dances, more sticking of our tummys, more hug with a bare chest, for you enjoy it so much, more karate , more racing trucks with you son.
But if i do this now for another 4 years, I will not be able to relax with you for remaining 40 odd years. My designation is an atm and let me fulfill it.
For if the atm does not generate the money, you wouldnt be allowed near my bedside at death. History has proved it. It dosent matter if i am a good person.
I am forgoing the present 10 years to make the future 40 years better for us. Sorry.
And yes it wouldnt be that easy for I need to teach you how bad money is or rather humans are?

The duality?

this is wat i am

this is right

but this is wat is happening

can u just see this is wat i am

nothing beyond it?

the circumstance, situations, feeling give rise to the what is

if u feel frustrated

feel to blast out - blast out

but dont enter the duality

to make the what is to what should be

be totally with what is

a new outlook

new thot to be with

to assimilate

to live

JK says all this

the higher soul

the better person

the consciouness

all ideas and ideaology to keep us humans conditioned in this never ending duality

 

 

means and methods to say

am not responsible

the moment u divide

the momonet u say

enthe cheiyana

nyan ingane ayie

u have observer and observed

a duality at the core

tats the starting point

 

 

who is telling that

u have someone who observes

and something that is being observed

and gap is requried for this

go stand touching ur eyes to the mirror

u cant observe

?

a gap

u stand always in a weather of 40degres

u wouldnt know its hot

u stand away from 40 deg at 30deg

thats when there is the observer and observed

the same

if u observe that - oh i know .. am a naggin wife

thats duality

an observer standing away from the observed

the gap

its the same

lets work from the center outward

then u can apply it on ur mom

or any situation

it start withing

 

 

 

 

a radical change

can i break of all relation with shobit

and be totally in that present condition

can i not be influced by centuries of conditioning

of what should be has be fed to me

that bro and bro in law relation cant break

of relations are like that

sweet and sour

can i be totally with the wat is?

can i not allow any external influence

 

 

 

to make me look at what should be?

can not be dual?

can i not observe the same

enthe cheiyana

i have become a bad person

i was good

a gd family man respecting relations

now married life made me this

for that is observer and observed

u see the similarity?

 

 

and did u notice ur comment

difficult to change

again a observer who says

this is what is

and what is change

its the other side which u wish to step in

the what should be

in this case my talk became the what should be

this is the same

conditioning

earlier it was socitety ideology

now it became mine